~ Nick Tolson ~ Viz, Private Eye writer...

A leaked, earlier 'draft' copy of the Conservative election manifesto has revealed that the government could outmanoeuvre Labour's proposals to take Britain back to the 1970's, with their own plan to take the country back to the 1870s, before most of the great Victorian parliamentary reforms in social welfare, worker rights and suffrage were passed on to British society.                  Pay't mill owner permission to come to work The report, marked 'confidential,' details how the next Conservative government will go much further than Jeremy Corbyn, taking Britain back to the glory days of the greatest Empire on which the sun never set - a time when it was run by about two dozen rich, paternalistic white male  entrepreneurs with long grey beards. Describing 'halcyonic days when t here was a general relaxation of laws that inhibited private enterprise and economic growth,' the document states that a post-Brexit Britain could see those times again

"Don't let a lack of information on refund and exchange policies ruin your Easter ,"  warns Geoff Johns, your local trading standards officer. text follows pic... IF, like me you love chocolate, Easter eggs can bring unmitigated joy and pleasure, for the old, the young - even diabetics! But, in this upcoming holiday season, for every happy bunny, there's always some unlucky person who ends up with a raw deal - which can all too easily end in petty arguments, family feuds, divorce - and ultimately, prison and financial ruin. Every year we see problems for the consumer, so a little preparatory advice here - from your local Trading Standards Department - can go along way to solving any issues you may have when buying and consuming Easter -promoted comestible and perishable goods.                                                             UNWANTED EGGS ONE seasonal Easter 'chestnut' for consumers is buying an unwanted egg . We've a